Working Girl Wednesdays: “Just Lie Down and Let Office Politics Wash Over You”

Welcome to Working Girl Wednesdays! Need advice on handling the complexities of the modern workplace? Well, fret no more! Whether it’s a senior partner making a move or a catty co-worker plotting for your plum position, Helen Gurley Brown’s 1964 book Sex and the Office has a solution. Every Wednesday on Glossed Over, I’ll present a new tip from the legendary editor of Cosmopolitan. Is her advice utterly ridiculous or startlingly prescient? You decide!

Given the current state of the economy, who couldn’t use a little advice about hanging on to a job—and landing a new one? In a chapter entitled “Jungle Warfare,” she takes on the office politics that can derail a career:

Why can’t you, by being a dear, sweet, good little girl and wearing dirt-repellent miracle fabrics, just lie down and let office politics wash over you?

It’s almost impossible! Though you should be safe as a secretary, for instance, your boss may be on the ten-most-unwanted list. If you’re having an affair with a man who’s headed for the firing squad, I suggest you stop whatever you’re doing right now, get a big white hanky, cut two holes for eyes, tie it around your head and go to the mirror. You’ll want to know how you’re going to look as you both go down together.

Time to hunt for a new job? After reading HGB’s advice to list age, marital status, and hobbies on a resume and attach an 8 x 10 glossy before sending it out, I’ve never been more glad to be alive in the era of sexual harassment and equal-opportunity laws. Here are some of her tips on interviewing for a new, ahem, position:

Come on strong charm-wise. A picture of the dreariest-looking wife and kiddies ever photographed gets a warm, “Your family? You must be very proud of them,” from you. Glow a little. Bring up anything happy you’ve ever heard about the firm.

Do you flirt? Only be hanging on every word the gentleman (or lady) utters and not interrupting. As a matter of fact, this is flirting if it’s a man; it’s just being attentive if it’s a woman. Let them do most of the talking. Your resume will have said almost everything necessary concering your career, so you don’t need to blabber away about that.

Next week: Eating on the job, part 1! Enjoy recipes such as “Rich Dessert Tuna Salad” and “High-Powered Meat Loaf,” and “have three or four potato chips for wickedness, if you like.”

Comments

[Bea]

Oh my. I gotta end my affair right now! I don't want to get laid off! ; )

[Sacre Bleu]

If you're having an affair with your boss, and he gets laid off, you have to join the Ku Klux Klan?