Ruffles Are Powerful, and Other Startling Insights from Vogue's Anna Wintour

So we’ve been avoiding the March issue of Vogue because, frankly, that cover photo of Jennifer Hudson bent over, mouth open in agony, scares the hell out of us.  But when we found the courage to flip open the magazine, we only had to make it past 150 pages of advertising to find something equally as frightening—Anna Wintour’s “Letter from the Editor.”  (Good thing we didn’t encounter “Life with André” in those pages, or we probably would have relegated this issue to use as a doorstop.  Or a bludgeon.  It’s heavy.)

Anyway, now that Kim France appears to have renewed her grasp on reality (for now, at least), it’s time to crown a new editor-in-chief whose monthly notes are completely lacking in pretty much every way possible.   

Let’s get cracking, shall we?  Unlike every other editor-in-chief on the planet, Anna’s letter requires two full pages (albeit with a healthy—and much-needed—15-page ad break in the middle).  Taking it from the top:

When we considered which face belonged on this month’s cover—this is our annual Power Issue—the name on the lips of my editors was Jennifer Hudson.  There is no more inspiring example of the power of talent and tenacity than her rise from America Idol reject to Golden Globe winner.

Right.  There is no victory more vindicating than Hudson’s, no tale of adversity more incredible.  American Idol contestants are apparently among the most down-trodden citizens of this planet.

The question of body image is a current one, and I can’t think of a more compelling and beautiful argument for the proposition that great fashion looks great on women of all sizes than the sight of Hudson in a Vera Wang dress on the red carpet.

On the red carpet, sure, but in the pages of the magazine?  Don’t hold your breath.

The model Natalia Vodianova is another woman whose charm and determination are as empowering as her beauty…

Oh, is beauty empowering?  That’s not what we’ve been told.

I’ve always believed that the great models develop the power to exert an individual influence—moral, aesthetic, commercial—on the culture.

Can someone please give us an example of a model having a “moral” influence?  Perhaps because it’s late at night, but we’re having trouble coming up with a single instance to justify Anna’s statement.  Unless Naomi Campbell hurling things at the help is somehow morally compelling.

(One thought about Ivanka: I’ve watched her since she was a teenager, and I continue to take great pleasure in seeing her develop into a woman of real substance.)

Sure, if substance is constituted by having your assistant help you cheat at Monopoly.

[Nancy Pelosi]’s stylish now, of course; but more importantly, she’s made history in becoming the first woman Speaker.

Good thing she mentioned that Speaker Pelosi’s stylish!  That’s the true accomplishment here, isn’t it?

Olivier Theyskens’s spectacular new dress for Nina Ricci, photographed by Irving Penn, is designed to resemble a bird about to take flight.  Jennifer Hudson aside, I can’t think of a more hopeful emblem of the power we celebrate this month.

This missive mentioned politicians, models, and Ivanka Trump, and a “megaruffle” dress and former reality-show contestant (yeah, yeah, we know she has an Oscar) are what represents power?  Funny, we thought power might involve something like the ability to, oh, write something meaningful to millions of women every single month, but we guess we were wrong.

Or we were right.  We bought the magazine and read every word she wrote, didn’t we?

Previously: Wintour: Believe In Yourself, Believe In Your Staff

Comments

[Jamie]

This post made me laugh so much I was in tears! It's so true, isn't it? This is exactly why I never buy American Vogue. The magazine is not really about fashion anymore, it's about who's popular and what's popular. Jennifer Hudson as role model? I cannot think of anything more ridiculous. Time to pack it in, Anna!