Lowest Common Denominator: InStyle, February

1: Number of times the word “hottie” appears on the cover

2: Number of photographs of Hilary Swank in this issue that aren’t part of her cover story

$99: Price of the most expensive of the “Frugal Finds for Under $100”

3: Number of plays on the already-annoying nickname McDreamy in “Man of Style: Patrick Dempsey” (McDaddy, McSomething, McGeeky)

17: Number of actresses revealing their teenage crushes on male celebrities

0: Number of actors revealing their  crushes on female celebrities

8: Number of celebrity nuptials declared “Weddings of the Year”

1: Number of former couples whose marriage to a new spouse was included (Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman)

3: Number of items mentioned as necessary to transform America Ferrera into the titular character on Ugly Betty (wig, eyebrow extensions, braces)

8: Number of items found “Inside America Ferrera’s Makeup Bag”

5: Number of pages devoted to “Eat Right, Look Great,” explaining how nutrition and supplements can improve the look of skin and hair

18: Number of pages in the beauty section featuring skin and hair products and makeup

1: Number of truly questionable Valentine’s Day presents in “More Great Gifts…” (InStyle suggests a red-and-pink doormat—is a doormat really the right implication for a Valentine’s Day gift?)